Tag Archives: John Stewart

Aug 18

This week has started better…plus an apology to Gilgrim.

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Let’s start with the apology…

Gilgrim, I totally meant to call you Saturday but when I got home from the kid’s gymnastics class I spent the whole afternoon and night in bed with a migraine. OK, I woke up at around 9 to wash the dishes but then went back to bed. Sorry about that.

I did attempt to send you several text messages yesterday but was thwarted each time by my phone. I’m not sure what exactly it says about me that when I match wits against an inanimate object I lose miserably. Well, I’m sure I could figure out what that says but I don’t want to.

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Mar 19

An Open Letter to Tina Fey

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Dear Tina,

This is the second time in two days that I have written one of these letters. Yesterday, I read that Parker Posey had made some disparaging remarks about Judd Apatow, and I felt compelled to respond (though it is doubtful Ms. Parker, or anyone for that matter, gives a rat’s ass about said response…).

And today I read that you have similarly disparaged John Stewart:

Fey tells Reader’s Digest she prefers it when audience members laugh rather than applaud because, “You can prompt applause with a sign.” She added, “My friend Seth Meyers coined the term ‘clapter,’ which is when you do a political joke and people go, ‘Woo-hoo.’ It means they sort of approve but didn’t really like it that much. You hear a lot of that on [whispers] ‘The Daily Show.’ ”

Now I’m willing to admit that you were pretty enjoyable as co-anchor on Weekend Update. I am also willing to admit that, despite all of my innate sense of what is right and good, Mean Girls is very good film.

But I have to ask…how far up your anal cavity have you shoved your ego inflated head, you stupid cow?

Seriously!

Last time I checked, John Stewart’s worst bits on The Daily Show were 10 times funnier than anything you ever did on SNL. And while we’re on the subject of SNL, how, exactly, did it feel to be the head writer during a time when, pretty much everyone and their mother, agreed that the show was a mere shell of its once glorious self?

I think I’ve watched about 10 total minutes of 30 Rock since it has been on, so maybe I’m talking out of my ass here, but it seems to me that it wants to be a good 30 minute long comedy (Flight of the Conchords, It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, and 10 Items or Less come to mind), but it can’t. Maybe it’s you, and maybe it isn’t but I have to seriously question anyone who questions John Stewart’s ability to make an audience laugh.

Oh, and by the way, quoting Seth Myers as some kind of “comedic expert” is like going to Dr. Seuss for medical advice.

Now I’m willing to admit that maybe this whole thing was taken out of context. It is certainly hard to read a satiric remark in print and understand its full meaning. And we are talking about a quote showing up on the New York Post…so skepticism of the source is an issue. But I get the sense, from other interviews of yours that I’ve seen and read, that you believe yourself to be one of the funniest people in America.

Guess what?

You’re not!

But John Stewart is…so kindly shut your stupid pie hole!

Love,

kilian

Feb 25

Post Oscar Wrap Up

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I didn’t really bring attention to the Oscar’s before they were handed out last night, mainly because I haven’t seen too many of this year’s nods and so felt I had no place to comment on them.

(I did see No Country for Old Men yesterday, which the wife did not like at all, exsulis seemed more or less ‘meh’ on the film, and I liked quite a bit…)

The show itself, however, well I can talk about that all I want!

Yes, it’s long, and mostly boring. Yes we hear a bunch of crap about how the movies are “magic.” Yes it’s self-congratulatory to a ridiculous degree.

Then why do people watch every year?

It’s not like it ever changes, but inevitably people always complain the next day, even though they sat through it all the night before.

Personally, and I realize I’m in the minority hear, I enjoy every drawn out second. I mean, when you’re talking about the most important award that a place like Hollywood can hand out, then yeah, I expect it to be long, and pompous.

For me, though, the best parts are generally when the winners of the “lesser” categories give their acceptance speeches. You know, every once in a while a major winner will give the audience a really true and hearfelt moment; I think a few most prominent in recent memory are Tom Hanks (when he won for Philadelphia), Cuba Gooding Jr. and Roberto Benigni. But generally, when the two or three guys who win for Sound Editing (or whatever) come up, you’re really seeing someone at one of the defining moments of his/her life. Sure, it’s got to be great to win Best Actress or Best Director, but those are generally won by actual celebrities. And I assume that when your face is plastered all over magazines and you earn millions of dollars a year, something like winning an Oscar is much less important than if you spend your days locked in an editing booth…

To his credit, John Stewart granted such a moment to someone last night. Marketa Irglova, one of the duo winners of Best Song did not get a chance to say her thank you’s, but was brought back on stage by Stewart after a commercial break. It should go down as the best moment from 2008′s show, it won’t, but it should…although the “Gaydolph Titlar” joke was a close second.

Care to give your (well, sort of) thoughts on the night? Well then, there is a brand new poll up so you can do just that…

The best part of the whole night, though, comes to us from Jimmy Kimmel…

kilian