Alright, I was planning on putting this up later, but hells, it’s Friday let us join together and celebrate!
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As is the new tradition, Kilian wrote this, and I can’t but completely agree with the sentiment about Lucas’ most recent batch of films. I love Star Wars, I really do, but I refused to give him any more money after that bulimic food-fight called the release of Episodes 1-3. Complete utter garbage. No more money for you you giant, inner-tube sized double chin bastard. My fear, is that the new Indy might very well follow the same suit… I hope it doesn’t, but it’s my fear none-the-less, and I think a reasonable one at that.
As an aside, Sang my resident gangsta’ rap expert, was kind enough to point out that 50 Cent would never throw up the West Side hand gesture as he is from the East Coast… hence the Churchill reference, because in my mind all gangsta’ rappers throw up silly hand gestures and this is the only one I bother to recognize and store in me brain.
I will let Kilian add to the rest of this and try not to take up any more space in this post, because I’m sure he has a ton to say.
Cheers,
Hey all, Kilian here.
I think we can all agree that 10, maybe even 5 years ago, the thought of a new Indiana Jones would have made many of us sit wistfully by staring out a window fondly remembering a more innocent time when Indy delighted us with his ass-kicking brand of archeology and general pimpness.
And I like Harrison Ford, I really do. But no amount of special effects magic making is going to change the fact that, since the last Indy film, he has turned into a zombie. I mean a literal zombie. You hear him speak in the last couple years? PURE ZOMBIE! And I don’t think that one of the living dead really has the dexterity necessary to battle Nazi’s, search for long treasures of the Old Testament, and get it on with chick 1/4 his age.
I can hear the complaints already. You’re thinking, “Spielberg will be directing this time, not Lucas.” But it’s time to face the truth, kids. Lucas and all things Lucas related have run their course. We can thank him for all the fond memories from our childhoods, but he needs to be stopped before he’s allowed to unleash his foul venom on future generations.
