Normality Restored

A person’s memories are powerful things. The naturality of aging and maturing forces us into a constant state of change. I read something once about how close to an illusion all of life (as we know it) is. It stated that since the past and the future are not things we are experiencing, and that the present is not a stationary thing, it is very difficult to grasp things that we perceive as important in our lives. Memories are all we have. Being things of the past, memories seem like landmarks for the people we were at those times. Buoys drifting in a vast ocean of forgotten hours, days, and weeks. Memories alone tend to be rather static though. Physical inputs are what really electrifies memories. Movies, books, photos, and songs are some of the most common and easily accessible of these sensory inputs.

Though I remember events that happened in my childhood, what is difficult to remember is exactly how I felt at any given time. A fragment of it might return though, with the right physical input. A good example is the He-Man theme song. I used to watch that show all the time when I was 4 or 5 years old. One day, the show vanished. I didn’t hear or see anything of the original show for about 20 years. Then one day, I looked it up on Youtube and the opening theme was there. It felt weird to see and hear it (to say the least). Even now, just the “Filmation” sound effect at the beginning is like someone poking around in my brain with a popsicle stick. But above all the weirdness, it reminded me of simpler times.

I am not completely mature. I hope I never will be. And I find it unsettling when I see evidence that other people are. I find kids to be the most interesting, genuine, and creative people that exist. To lose all of that by growing is one of the most depressing things I can imagine, but some people can’t seem to help it. This is not to say that adults cannot be these things, but these are aspects commonly sacrificed to better conform to the adult world. They let their inner children die, or lock them away in the forgotten chambers of their hearts, often times becoming perpetual sourpusses.

I didn’t read much as a kid. I suppose I just wasn’t raised that way. I remember reading being encouraged in elementary school, but in a vague, disconnected way. No one told me about a specific book or why reading was a good thing, they just told me that reading was GOOD and reading a LOT was BETTER. So I mostly watched movies. One of the movies I loved the most as a kid was The NeverEnding Story. My family rented it a ton of times and I never got sick of it. So when I was in high school and had finally taken to reading, it was an obvious choice.

Something about watching the movie when I was little and reading the book when I was in high school really intensified the power of the story for me. Since the end of the movie is only the halfway point of the book, I got the opportunity to pick up where I left off with all of these characters I had already loved for years. It was an opportunity that is rarely afforded. It all reminded me of those nights watching the old vhs tape long before the many stress of high school and growing up. And I enjoyed it. On top of the obvious anti-stress memories attached to the story for me, it was really good. I have such a passion for intensely imaginative things, and the book is definitely of that category.

Bastian is a kid that likes to read and finds himself uncharacteristically swiping a book from an old bookstore owner. You read about Bastian, and as he reads The NeverEnding Story, you do too. Atreyu is the book’s protagonist. He is called upon to find a cure for the Childlike Empress, though he doesn’t know what he’s looking for. All he knows is he is to travel in one direction with no weapons and find the answer for himself. As Bastian reads the story, he realizes that certain characters in the book are aware of him, and eventually call upon him to help their world and become a part of the story. It is stated to Bastian that as he has shared the experiences of the characters in his book, others have shared his experiences in their book, and so on. Hence, “NeverEnding Story”.

In the sequel to the movie, Mr. Coreander (the bookstore owner) suggests something that had intrigued me. When Bastian scoffs and says that he has already read the NeverEnding Story, Mr. Coreander smiles and says “Ah, but have you ever read a book twice? Books change each time you read them” When I first saw this, I figured it was just a plot gimmick. I didn’t think about it much at first. Later on though, I understood that it isn’t the book that changes (like it does in the movie) it’s the reader that has changed. Everything seems different because of the changing way that you understand things. It took me a while to really understand how growing and learning changes your perception. Sometimes this can really kill a good sensory input for nostalgia, but it really depends on the amount you have learned and changed. I’ve found that even though I’m a bit different now, I can still remember how I perceived something when I was little.

As much as I enjoyed the book, I don’t remember a great deal of it now. I did begin to read it again though. I can only hope that reading it will continue to reawaken all the old memories. And so far, it has.