Aleister Gilgrim

Welcome faithful Normalinauts, and newcomers as well (don’t have a clever name for specific followers/supporters of the Save the Monkey Project – someone get to work on that, will ya? Awesome, thanks). Okey doke, diving in to the Design Blog 02. In the first Design Blog the main image was a character study for the story’s title character (different than a lead character, but we’ll cover that later), Monkey. This time around, as the process is refining itself, we have character designs for the four main characters of the series, Monkey, Ras, Hari and Pig (the fifth, Naga, is not pictured here). You may notice that Monkey looks slightly different in this version, which is completely natural. Right now the designs for all of the characters (as viewable above) are pretty finalized, meaning that the basic components and the rough shapes and features that make them them are pretty set in place. However, this isn’t the real final version of any of the characters since they will continue to be polished and refined, until the actual drawing style including the line weights and amount of detail is finished by me… like I said, it is a process, but for the most part, these are finished enough to be recognizable from here on out.

I said originally that this design blog would follow the progress of putting the story from concept to completion, and so it will. However, there is something to clarify, this is not merely just to be a GN, instead the entire project is being planned as both a GN and something else (something moving) which for now, we’ll simply think of as a cartoon. So this blog will actually be the documentation of the design process for both sides of the project concurrently. Believe me, this makes sense, especially because it’s being developed the same way for both end products. So there you go, a little more bang for your buck ^__^. With this in mind, let’s get into the main subject of this entry in the STMP Design Blog 02: Beginning the Process/Story Start.

Basically everystory starts with a script (This is a basic Script Format breakdown), but before that is the outline. The outline covers the basics of the plot events and when things are going to happen without delving into specific dialog or the smaller series of non-plot-moving action.

This is a screen cap of the outline for Monkey3030. Obviously, since the story is not released yet, I can’t show a full readable version of the outline itself (trying to avoid spoilers etc ^__^)

Monkey3030 Plot Outline – GN & Cartoon

There are different ways to do outlines, and everyone does them a bit differently. In my version I tend to write something more akin to what’s known as a Story Bible, but it isn’t nearly as detailed as an actual one. The outline above covers the main characters and a simple run through of their journey throughout the entire first portion of the series (roughly 2 seasons of the cartoon and several GNs, depending). It also lays out some of the important ideas and events that make the world of M3030 the way it is as well as defining the main characters, who they are, how they inter-relate with eachother and what their part is in the overall story and their individual motivations are (their “why’s”).

From the outline the next phase (short of finalizing the outline, which some people do first, while others, like me, tend to do during the next phase… it doesn’t matter how you do it, it’s completely individual) is the rough pass, or first draft of the Script. There, in theory, is a difference between scripts for comics and scripts for film/teley. However, it really doesn’t matter. I think that mine tend to fall somewhere in the middle of the two. While I don’t follow the exact format of a tele-script (where one general rule is that each pg of script = roughly 1 min of film), I do write in a form closer to a film script over a script for comics which traditionally give a panel by panel and page by page breakdown of the story and the action. Below, you can see a screen capture of the pilot script for M3030, in its current state. Even though the series is being developed for both GN and cartoon formats, this pilot script will likely be the basis for the beginning entries in both versions. This is the first pass, or rough version, which means it’s the very first draft of the script. The most important thing, and the thing that Miss April December has been steadfastly and reminding me of, is that it needs to just get banged out and done.

After the first pass is done, the next step is to take that roughed first draft and to do another pass on it. This next pass is when you take a real critical look at the entire script and how it flows and make the first series of changes to help improve it and make it the best version of what it can be. This will include dialog changes, scene shifts and pretty severe editing (if you’re being honest). Not everyone likes to do this themselves, and it’s always a good idea to get another set (or two) of eyes that you trust on it to help you out. And while we’re on the subject of editing and going into the next pass on the initial rough, there is another stage that can also be combined with the first run of editing. We’re talking about Punch Up. 

Monkey3030 Pilot Script – GN & Cartoon

Punch up is something that is especially needed for scripts that aren’t quite hitting their stride, or their rythem for the intended audience. Most people (like Urban Dictionary dot com) think of Punch Up as merely applying new jokes, one liners and other additions to make a script more appealing for an audience different than was originally intended. This is close, but not entirely accurate, Punch up does include that more times than it should, but it basically means to take an existing script and refine it, usually make it a bit flashier and infuse it with story elements (action, jokes, dialog) that make it mpore exciting, to make it jump… hence “punching” it up. Currently, the pilot script is just over the 20 pg mark, and roughly half-way through the actual plot of the episode. Once it’s finished and we go through to punch it up a bit, where the length will probably be cut down somewhat, and the dialog will likely be altered and edited (added to as well as cut down). Which brings me to the other weird part about my scripts, why they’re so long…

When I write scripts, I’m more than a little paranoid that the action isn’t clear enough, or I have a very particular and specific idea in mind for how something happens on screen (or on the page), which means my prose descriptions tend to be somewhat lengthy. Add to that, the fact that I’m very wordy as a writer (you couldn’t tell yet?) and you can see why the “prose chunks” are big fat portions of the script. In my script format you can tell the prose sections since they’re Left Justified, while all dialog is centered. Look back at the script again (sorry it’s not easier to see, but you should still be able to see the shapes) and you can likely see what I’m talking about.

As I said before, the pictured script will be used for both versions of the story, but there will be some differences in how the final translations happen. This has to do with the different strengths that each format has, for instance in the GN format (much like more regular prose work, ie novels, fiction etc) it’s a lot easier and less jarring to the story to break suddenly into internal monologues and asides, or as is done often in manga and its ilk, to cut to ‘chibi’ stylized snippets allowing the characters to comment on current story situations and dialog in a way that can sometimes break the fourth wall a bit. The teley version of the script will also likely have a bit more dialog, but overall might have less ‘content’ because the delivery of certain lines of dialog may be faster than and take less screen time then the amount of space they take up printed on a page in a word bubble. Add to that, that the GN’s page count restrictions for individual chapters, doesn’t exactly match the more restrictive time constraints of actual film. For better or for worse, the pilot ep of the cartoon will need to be no longer then about 22 min, where the GN’s chapter can be any length I want (genrally accepted as about 20-30 pgs) and the content of the cartoon pilot could be spread over several GN chapters. It makes sense in my head, which is where I guess, it’s most important for that to happen.

The last thing that I want to mention is that even though M3030 is based on The Journey To The West, it isn’t exactly a retelling, a reimagining, or even pure homage… frankly, I’m not sure what term should best describe it. JttW is certainly the original source material, but the themes and point of that story are not the same as M3030… all the same for anyone interested in learning more about the ’source’ of M3030’s story I have some good things to check out:

• Monkey Magic Teley Series (crazy 70’s weirdness and fun – pretty literal translation)
• Journey to the West: Plot Summary (broken down chapter by chapter, in awkward, but very accurate language)
• Journey to the West: Complete Translation (much better and I think, more accurate that the traditionally known Timothy Richard version of the manuscript)
• Monkey: Journey to the West Stage Adaptation website (the official website of the new stage production created by Damon Albam, and Jamie Hewlett, of Gorillaz fame)

Until the nest enrty in the Save the Monkey Project – Design Blog, remember, I love you all,

–Aleister

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