As any faithful reader should know, Gilgrim and April are “expecting” in the biblical sense.

So as the fateful day approaches, I thought it wise to regail the happy couple (and, by default, anyone reading this) with a bit of wisdom gained from 14 months of parenthood. And that bit of wisdom:

Parenthood ages you like nobody’s business!

On Thursday, I was having a rousing e-mail discussion with Mojo of Poor Mojo’s “various sundrys” about the ridiculousness of housing, particularly in the Golden State when said Mojo ended one of his replies with “tyvm.”

Now I was never up on the netspeak, but I could usually figure out crap like that, back in the day, say a year and a half ago, when I still felt some “connection” to the kids.

But that “tyvm” was so totally perplexing to me that I had to have Mojo translate. That’s how sadly out of touch I am.

Then came the weekend. MTV was playing a “So You Think You Can Dance” season 2 marathon all day Saturday and Sunday. Now I didn’t watch every single minute of the thing, but I certainly watched a lot more of it than, say, is healthy.

One minute to digress….let it be emphatically said that I do not, nor does my wife, or anyone even remotely connected to my house, watch Dancing with the Stars. The difference between the two shows might seem negligible to some. But one has B and C level celebrities with no appreciable appititude to dance or any dance related activity barely scraping through routines set to horribly contrived “renditions” of terrible songs that should in know way ever be accompanied by choreography. The other has actual, skilled DANCERS, performing actual DANCING, choreographed by good choreographers and accompanied by appropriate music. Can you guess which is which? Now, you may not appreciate dance, as is certainly your right. But my wife danced for 15 years, and it’s something that is taken seriously in our house (though, maybe not as seriously as, say, baseball or Premier League Football).

Do I think it is possible I would have watched so much “So You Think You Can Dance?” before I had a kid….well, I suppose anything is possible. But it certainly would have been highly improbable. Now….? The evidence speaks for itself.

So, be wary innocent expecting couple. You will find many changes occurring in your lives soon. Not all of them will sit well with the image you have of your former self.

This entry was posted on Monday, October 22nd, 2007 at 7:32 pm and is filed under Absurdity of Life, Complaints, Parenthood, Post, Television, The kids. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.